Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Head On: Apply Directly to the Forehead
Head On: Apply Directly to the Forehead
Head On: Apply Directly to the Forehead


If I see that commercial one more time, I am going to apply my foot directly to the television screen. :)

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Have you ever been at like...a family reunion or somewhere where there's lots of old-timers, bless their hearts, that sit around and reminisce about the "good old days"? And inevitably the subject of what things "used to cost" will come up...

"Why, I remember back when gas cost a nickle a gallon...a NICKLE!"

"I paid $13,000 for my first house."

"I bought my first car, brand new, for $500...and that's a fact."

I remember, what the heck happened to the world?? Life used to be so EASY and CHEAP. Then I learned about a little phenomenon called inflation.

So now all I can think about when I hear these types of conversations is how they are conveniently omitting one small little much their WAGES were back then. Why do we never hear this conversation?

"Why, I remember back when I worked myself ragged everyday for a measly 15 cents an hour. Boy those sure were the bad old days..."
My next gripe is aimed squarely at Subway Sandwiches. Seems like I've had a lot of fast-food related gripes lately...don't take this to be indicative of my eating habits. Okay, take it to be indicative. I have a problem, I know. But that is beside the point...back to Subway.

Subway, eat fresh, make it your way, blah blah, all good and fine. Subway sandwiches are good, no question...but I think they've become a little bit TOO flexible in their sandwich-building process. I mean, you look up at the board and they have all these named sandwiches, tons of 'em. And that's great. But what you don't realize is that, with the exception of one item, the meat, you can turn any sandwich into any OTHER sandwich.

For example. Let's say you want the Tuscan Chicken Sandwich. Sounds pretty good, right? It did to me too. The picture looked scrumptious, in fact. Then comes the onslaught of options. "What kind of bread?" "What kind of cheese?" "Toasted?" "What vegetables?" On and on.

Through all this it occurs to me...what exactly makes this sandwich a Tuscan Chicken one anyway? So far it's just just a chicken sub sandwich with whatever the hell I want on it. So I ask...

"What exactly GOES on this so-called Tuscan Chicken sandwich anyway?"

"Oh, did you want the special Tuscan sauce?"

Um, yeah. Why on earth would they just assume that you know how to make their sandwiches? I asked for the Tuscan Chicken Sandwich, just freaking make me a TUSCAN CHICKEN SANDWICH!! :)

You know what Subway needs? They need to just have defaults on all their sandwiches, but express to you at the beginning that you can substitute anything you want. Not only would this make things easier, but it would speed up the line a little bit too, 'cause let's face it...Subway ain't exactly Wendy's. Maybe I'll fire this gripe off to their HQ as an email...