"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."
We've all heard this. It sounds nice...almost inspirational. But with a little thought, you realize it's a pretty stupid phrase. To illustrate, I'll use one of my favorite debating techniques, the always handy proof-by-counterexample...
How about if someone smacks you upside the face as hard as they can with a boat paddle? Probably won't kill you. Did it make you stronger? I would argue that it did not, in any way, make you stronger. Probably just a lot of pain, a severely damaged relationship, and perhaps a permanent mark.
How about a nasty bout with Leukemia? One which devastates your system to the point of NEAR-death. Unlikely you would be chosen 1st for the tug-o-war team.
And finally...let's say you have SEVERE case of facial acne. Doesn't kill you. Maybe you've learned to deal with it and continue to live your life...maybe even hit the inspirational speaking circuit to tell your story. Oops, no one will book you, don't want to give people nightmares with your scary-looking grill.
Now, in fairness, I think that I get the gist of the phrase. I guess I just take issue with the absoluteness of its tone. More appropriate, I believe, would be "SOME things that don't kill you make you stronger". But how un-inspirational does that sound? :)
I would agree with you as far as this phrase buggin' me. I think it is something that people say when they haven't taken the time or effort to think of something better to say. Kinda the Lazy Man's answer. Just like "It'l get better" UGH! I have major issues with that phrase! M A J O R!!!
ReplyDeleteEvery situation is different and I do believe that if we learn from our experiences, we will grow and become stronger. However, that is an individual choice. If you’re crying in your room about some dorkus making fun of your shoes, then how's that making you stronger?
If you're searching for inspiration... then let people know that they aren't ever going to be given anything that they can't handle. The strength for them to overcome is already within them. Unless, of course, you are referring to a boat paddle to the nose, in which case, they should look into taking Martial Arts, so that they have quicker reflexes and can beat up the other person, first! Just a thought...
Nietsche, the one who either first said this or at least popularized it, meant it in the context of an existential experience. Like Dostoyevsky wrote in the Underground Man, people may even find solace in a toothache, for it means that we are still alive. After all, we are more a product of how we react to external stimuli than the actual stimulus itself.
ReplyDeleteYou had me laughing loudly with the boat paddle example. Just like Mike said, you are still the same Lane. For some reason I think you had some of these same grips when we were kids, I guess the Commodore 64 didn't have a blog spot to share them on...
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